Wednesday, September 10, 2014

5 septembre 2014

My friends (*coughJustinecough*) LOOOOOOVE sushi, so for lunch today, we went to eat sushi. Again. Not that I mind because I have learned the joy of eating raw things ^_^
This + raviolis japonais (HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA) + miso soup + salad was 12 euros. Not bad, considering we were in a very expensive part of Paris (in other words, the neighborhood I live in)

Afterwards, we ran some errands before heading to class. But of course, one of my classmates, Nancy, is taking baking classes at le Cordon Bleu. Yea, that's right, THE CORDON BLEU. Oh and did I mention she baked us a cake?
YEEEEEES. NANCY YOU'RE THE BEST <3

Class finally ended (yes, two hours is a long time, even when there is chocolate cake!) and Justine and I headed off to the Latin Quarter to buy our textbooks and meet up with Curran and Natasha for dinner. Although we were told the bookstore closed at 8PM, they closed at 7:30PM and stopped letting in new customers at 7:25ish. We got there at 7:25. Boohoo sucks to suck. We went to go eat dinner instead and I had delicious steak aux frites:
Okay, I think I say that all the food in France is delicious but it honestly, truly is delicious.

* ~ * ~ * ~ *

So anyone who really knows me knows that I love french fries (potatoes in general, but especially fries). But I think I enjoyed these fries a lot more than they deserved to be enjoyed (they weren't necessarily mediocre but they definitely weren't amazing). And, since I am writing in hindsight, I will tell you what I realized over the next couple days; so ever since maybe Thursday night/Fridayish, I began to craaaave salty snacks. At first I thought it was just because that's totally me; I love chips and salt and yummerz and things that make you fat. But this craving was incredibly strong; even things I would normally find really salty, weren't very salty. I thought I might be getting sick -- I remembered one time I got chicken noodle soup while I was sick and when I ate it for dinner, I thought it was disgustingly bland so I dumped a ton of salt in it. The next day, I was feeling a little bit better and I ate another can of the same exact chicken noodle soup and it was TOTALLY FINE! -- so maybe I was sick and couldn't taste correctly? But on Saturday, I found out that craving salty things means you're extremely stressed out. I spent the next day or two trying to figure out why I was so stressed out and I think I've figured it out now (it is now Wednesday):
  • Every morning, when I wake up, I realize I'm in a different world; a francophone world. And it's scary.
  • I am living in someone else's home so I have to be extra careful to clean up after myself and stay quiet and not bother anyone.
  • As soon as I wake up, I speak French.
  • Everyday tasks that normally take very little if not no brain power now require a lot of effort on my part to speak French and do as the French do.
  • Even when I'm speaking in English with my friends, I am constantly worrying if I am being "too American" (READ: loud).
  • Even when I'm speaking in English with my friends, if I accidentally bump someone, I have to immediately think to say "désolée" instead of "sorry."
  • All of my stress is only worsened by the fact that I am not very good at French.
  • Added bonus: it's stressful to know that I am one of the worst French speakers out of all the USC students
  • Ironically, I feel additional stress because I feel guilty for being stressed when I am living this marvelous life and I've been granted this amazing opportunity
  • Speaking of amazing opportunities, it stresses me out that my fear of speaking French is keeping me from practicing and improving and getting the most out of this experience
  • And of course, all of this is just being stacked on top of my normal level of stress caused by a crazyhecticstateofpanicbecauseiprocrastinatebuti'maperfectionistandthatisnotaverygoodcombination and my tendencytoputwaytoomuchonmyplateandwanttodoeverythingallthetimewhenreallywhatineedisrestandjusttodonothingatallevenifitsjustforashortwhile
Anyways, basically, I just needed to get this off my chest. Yes, France is fun and beautiful and delicious and awesome, but. It's hard. and I think it's getting a bit harder everyday.


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